Reach Out 4 Help

Asking for help isn’t easy.

How to feel comfortable reaching out for help at work when you need it.

As our world continues to change,  we’d like to explore a big challenge which we’re hearing now more than ever…

“I’m so stressed, it’s not sustainable and I need help, but I don’t feel I can reach out and ask for it at work.”

Now, of course there are so many reasons that get in the way of us reaching out … discomfort of an awkward conversation, fear of what others will think or impact on our career prospects.  Whilst all of these reasons are valid, we believe that our mental and physical wellbeing are more important.

This month’s Keep Your Thrive Alive video explores how you can reach out for help at work.  In it, Mark shares small changes you can easily make in how you:

  • think
  • feel and
  • behave

 …so that you can be comfortable and confident reaching out for help when you need it.

Mark also shares how you reaching out can also help the person you ask, and create a healthier culture where you work.

We’d love to learn what you found most useful, please share your comments below.

We look forward to seeing you next month and in the meantime..

Continue to stay safe, be well and thrive!

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16 Comments

  1. Mark Mulligan-Reply
    4th June 2020 at 11:03 am

    I’d love to hear from you …..
    • what’s the most useful thing about this video?
    • What do you think would be most useful to the people you work with?
    • What are the thoughts that normally hold you back and what are the thoughts that would be more useful for you personally?
    • What are you going to do?

    • Paul Curci-Reply
      4th June 2020 at 2:11 pm

      Mark, Thank you for your thoughtful insights. Here’s how I intend to put your ideas to use.
      I intend to ask the leaders I work with the following three questions:
      1. Do you want your people to be able to minimize distractions, by openly expressing their fears and concerns?
      2. Generally speaking, do they currently feel safe enough to share with one another, i.e. do they feel they work in a supportive environment?
      3. What are you doing to model the supportive behaviors you want to see in them? How are you expressing your own vulnerability, thereby making it safe for others?

      • Mark-Reply
        4th June 2020 at 3:07 pm

        Great ideas Paul, I particularly like ‘ How are you expressing your own vulnerability, thereby making it safe for others?’. Thanks for sharing!

    • Hash Chavda-Reply
      12th June 2020 at 8:12 am

      With the current events across the globe and sadly once again the negative consequences from lack of compassion and honouring diversity in peoples thoughts. I’m trying to be more authentic at work, it has been incredibly humbling as others reach out and share what is really going on for them and amazing to hear / coach.
      The wise words in your video and clear messaging is really helpful for these conversations so thank you

      • Mark-Reply
        12th June 2020 at 8:49 am

        Thank you for sharing Hash! It sounds like you are being big and brave at work and that others are finding that very supportive. Well done for standing up and being authentic!

  2. Sue Riley-Reply
    4th June 2020 at 12:05 pm

    the video was timely for me as I have just become a befriender so the web links will be great to pass on to others. Personally the phrase ‘this too will pass’ is invaluable during this strange phase we are living in. I am finding that sharing my own vulnerability with my many grandchildren is slowly encouraging them to share theirs too which is great and I will now talk through with them some of the phrases you used in the video.
    Thank you and stay safe

    • Mark-Reply
      4th June 2020 at 12:51 pm

      Sue, I’m so pleased that this video was so timely for you! I love the fact that it will help both you and your grandchildren

  3. Kirsty-Reply
    4th June 2020 at 1:36 pm

    I definitely think that the fear of an awkward conversation is something that would hold me back. I loved the story about when you ran for the tube and slipped – a really nice analogy to put things into perspective. Thanks Mark for another great video!

  4. Bern Maguire-Reply
    4th June 2020 at 1:39 pm

    I thought the most useful thing about this video was the part highlighting “This too shall pass.” Something which is relevant to so many situations, now more than ever given our new reality.

  5. Bern Maguire-Reply
    4th June 2020 at 1:41 pm

    What I found most useful about this video was the part highlighting “This too shall pass”. Such an important thing to keep in mind in so many situations, particularly given our new reality.

  6. Bryan-Reply
    4th June 2020 at 1:44 pm

    Great to see encouragement on speaking out… This continues to be a very challenging issue in the workplace and we all must play our part to change this. Thanks for the video Mark!

  7. Ismael Recinos-Reply
    5th June 2020 at 3:00 pm

    Hi Mark,
    This video really touched me. I am trying to help my brother who is going through a very though moment as a result of the pandemic back home (basically his business has collapsed from day to night and he is trapped in a very harsh lockdown implemented by the government in El Salvador -Central America- alone, away from wife and children who live in neighbour Nicaragua – but he has support from our extended family in El salvador. I’ve been talking to him and I’m so glad to realise that I have commented several of the ideas you share in this video with him without realising I knew them, seems almost that I wrote from “instinct” about the points you raise in this video. I hope you don’t mind if I share this video with him because you’ve made it brilliant. My brother is not an English speaker and struggles with understanding spoken English but the fact that you also write your ideas will help him a lot as he will be able to understand the important points just by reading.
    A MASSIVE THANK YOU for this. It will help us a lot in this current moment.
    Keep up with this fantastic work.

    • Mark-Reply
      5th June 2020 at 6:43 pm

      Ismael,I’m so glad you found it useful and shared it with your brother. My thoughts are with both of you at this difficult time, he’s a fortunate man to have so much help and support from you.

  8. Ben-Reply
    7th June 2020 at 3:58 am

    Another great timely video Mark. Definitely relate to finding it more difficult to reach out for help when I’ve actually needed it, mainly due to increased doubts and negativity common to a challenging period.
    As apposed to being more vulnerable and open when things are going well or once a tough time has passed, which I find alot easier.
    Reminding myself of how privileged I’ve felt when struggling friends have reached out to me, will help me not to deprive them of that feeling in future.
    Great example with your tube near miss also.
    Hopefully content like this will encourage more vulnerability in organisations and communities and ripple from there.

  9. Kath-Reply
    7th June 2020 at 7:25 pm

    I got trapped in the doors once and the driver publicly shamed me before freeing me. I’ll never chance it when the beeps go again! I think more and more people will be reaching out for help as we’re physically more remote from each other than we were before lockdown.

  10. Della Judd-Reply
    8th June 2020 at 9:02 am

    Hi Mark – really useful tips on how to frame things. This will pass is a great thing to remember. I have shared with some colleagues who are finding it difficult at the moment, it takes great courage to speak up but it is so important to do so. If everyone hides then we are not being authentic and we start to help to create a culture of shame around the subject. Being brave and asking for help signals to others that it is OK to do so as well.

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